Joseph and Dick the Turtle

Dick the turtle was one of the turtles in the local Batavian pet shop, his life was at first mundane and non-interesting before he met joseph.

The Incident; The Beginning
It was a normal day, when joseph decided that he wanted to adopt a turtle.

He went to the store and somehow accidentally slipped on a puddle while his zipper was open, making his dick come out and accidentally inserting it into the Dick the turtle, Dick the turtle then bit him.

Joseph lost his dick that day, but he didn't give up, he wasn't the type to give up after loosing his manhood, he went again but fate was trolling him that day because he slipped AGAIN and this time his balls got bit by Dick the turtle.

But he refused to give up and got there again, broke in the store and got Dick the turtle and adopted him.

His Life
Dick the turtle lived with joseph from that point forward, and his life was stable for a while until President Gee ordered for Joseph's arrest.

Joseph then knew the destructive capabilities of turtles such as dick, and the duo was almost un-beatable, it has happened two times where Gee send his goons to arrest Joseph but both lost their dicks, it was the last and third one who was able to arrest Joseph and Dick.

In prison Joseph and Dick were at first separated but after some time President Gee decided to be merciful and allow them to re-unite.

His Death; A Tragedy
It was when joseph got out of prison, and hired a random assassin called Mook to kill president Gee, Dick would reach the end of his story.

Joseph then joined in a plot to kill the vice president, and him and Dick were gonna do it together, They reached the VP's hideout and tried to throw Dick over the walls, but failed and then Joseph saw his best friend die in front of him, two soldiers came out and emptied their entire clip into Dick, killing him with no mercy then their audacity didn't stop there, they pissed on Dick's corpse.

While the VP did get killed in the end, Joseph was heart broken, All of Zealandia was.

then it was decided to establish a national Dick Day to honor and mourn the martyr.